omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
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His dick was poking my bladder. That big...
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
So my OCD kicked in and I cleaned his kitchen. His roommates were so grateful, they tried to pay me in weed.
YOU ACCEPTED, RIGHT?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Until then we have the self affirmation from retweets and nights alone with pizza..
Hey. I thought you were saving your 80s playlist til marriage.
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
A person can only vomit Fireball so much before they quit it forever
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize