Have you ever noticed that nowhere is the same thing as now here, i get my best ideas when i smoke
My Hamptons summer hookup resume reads like a walk-in clinic waiting list.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
I think Jabba the Hut is dying in the stall next to me.
I just had to explain to my grandma what a reach-around is. Too far..
I remember waking up on the bathroom floor and seeing my teeth behind the toilet
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