Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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