bahahaha. this guy working at subway literally has someone's name tattooed on his arm, crossed out, and another name below it.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
Drunk. But sober enough to know I hate gymnastics.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you said "this ones for the homies" and proceeded to pour the shot into your other cup instead of the ground b/c "good liquor is not meant to wasted no matter the circumstances"
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
You think he will forgive me for the paper being a week late if I bring him a beer?
...it's a 9am class...
We should. Taco Bell definitely gives me the shits though.
It's girls night. No shame, just febreeze
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
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