Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
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