Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
I gotta bail on the cookout tonight. Im at the er getting stitches. Re-enacting porno went horribly wrong.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
I'm very fluent in vodka, but that seems to be a whiskey dialect.
sold 4 oz of weed today pantsless. man i love college.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
WHY DID HE INTRODUCE ME TO HIS MOM? CAN'T HE JUST HIDE ME LIKE EVERYONE ELSE I'VE EVER DATED?@!
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
All I want is dick and wine.
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