I don't think I can get bothered with getting laid tonight
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
At what point last night did I start ordering doubles?
Right after we had the just friends talk..
Well he told me I'd never be a wizard, and so I responded with you'll never have a big penis. After that we both just sat there and cried.
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Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
He just subscribed to one of my Spotify playlists. The next step is sex.
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Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
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