? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
she said "lets play dickbreaker!" and then threw my blackberry at my dick as hard as she could.
I havent jerked off in so long, my dick literally prevented me from rolling over in my sleep this morning. new definition of painful?
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't even want to go. i just want to be a hermit and live in a cave with an elephant that pisses vodka
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.
Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize