I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I wish i was in the wii world.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I'm going to make out with someone. I'm on a mission. I don't even care if I'm wearing beer goggles. As long as he's not shorter than me, gay, or a woman.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
yeah well, its not like my astrogynecology class is teaching me what i need to know
im almost 90% sure there is no such thing as astrogynecology.
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
last time we were there you stole a tap from the toilets. How are you confused that your bag is full of baubles you clearly can't stop collecting their furnishings
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
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