We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
Everyone heard you scream that I was to be naked, in your bed in 5 minutes. We were one hell of a shitshow spectacle
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
Just masturbating and watching Sports Center...is this what it's like to be a guy?!
Sitting naked in my bed eating leftover Mexican food drinking coors light.. Can it get any more single than this?
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Randomize