i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
My head weighs 7 pounds. i know this because i spent the majority of the night passed out in the bathroom, using the scale as a pillow.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if you are still a virgin by winter break we are throwing an aztec themed sacrifice the virgin party
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I just tried to make cleaning gasoline off your shoes with toilet paper in the Chemistry Building bathroom look normal. I failed.
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Apparently I was telling them, "I AM A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN AND I DON'T NEED YOU TO HOLD MY HAIR," and I pulled my hair back and puked.
You've changed since you got that strap on
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
hes sooooo boring!!! I feel like I’m in a relationship with myself now. I have an 8 inch dildo under my bed, THATS how much I’m in a relationship with myself.
At least I’m an “essential employee” and can still bang my boss. \n\nFingers crossed my husband doesn’t ask why I’m essential, the orgasms are too good to give up during this pandemic
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