This dress was meant to end up on your floor
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
The freshman came home at 9 this morning with one heel, no pants, and a strangers sweatshirt covered in tequila-scented vomit. I think we're done corrupting her for a while.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
You think you know everything because you're wearing a sweater
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
Come on in and take your pants off
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