If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
just used a caramelizing gun to spark a bowl, i don't think today could get much better than this.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
She said we should all be mermaids since didn't breathe for 9 months inside our mothers. I want her logic.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
Bringing my cat to a booty call was not my finest hour
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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