whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
You leaned over so she could squirt ketchup in your hair and then started chanting "KETCHUP NIGHT!! KETCHUP NIGHT!!!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There was just a girl standing next to me on the train, wasted, wearing only one shoe. I so wanted to pat her on the shoulder and say "oh honey, we've all been there"
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Randomize