Bro, I met the coolest hottest chick tonight and she has the hottest friends.
Where are you?
Strip Club
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my cabbie only has one arm...this can't be safe
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
Fell down the metal stairs and some guy tried to fight me after you left. I fell asleep with cadbury eggs in my mouth too.
The lady at Walgreens was all excited my pregnancy tests had a coupon.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
don't do laundry while your drunk! i found a ketchup bottle & clothes hanger in the washer this morning!
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
Randomize