We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
Did you really just use your nipple as a unit of measurement?
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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