Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
I'll just be here. Naked. Eating tots and jello like a muh fuggin G
There's nothing like telling your girl to hold your pants while peeing on your neighbors door
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
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