And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Turns out I wasn't throwing up blood, I just threw up so hard it ripped my tonsils. Thank you Jameson.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
My landlord showed my apartment to a prospective tenant today and I had my vibrator and gun both chilling on my nightstand
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
Did you really just reference your penis in a pep talk? I think I may love you more now.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
feeding cats lunchmeat on my kitchen floor. come pour me another shot.
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