So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
My water bill is like twice the normal amount. I need a boyfriend.
Do I even want to know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know, I don't really wanna ask the question, "Mom why am I not circumcised?"
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
It wasn't until I lost my earring that I realized "I've been here before". Turns out we fucked a year ago. We've decided to make it a tradition.
She just. Cock slapped me. With string cheese.
I just found out how I got home last night. The bartenders found me sitting in the brush peeing and called me a cab. Have you seen my underwear?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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