you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
I'm sorry I told you to go fuck yourself after you said good morning to me when I was hungover.
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
eating a weed cupcake with nutella on top at work. i AM a star!
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