Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
Just before going down on me she said, "I need a hairband for all of the jobs I'm about to perform."
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
When we were done making out, some guy ran into the room yelling, "I'll save you Brandon! I'll save you!"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She sat next to me on the couch and said "word going around is you got a sweet cock". My nickname problem was solved!
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
Is it sad or funny that I just bought two pregnancy test at the dollar store to give away to people on New Year's Eve while driving for Uber.
Ever get that feeling that you're the back up booty call and half way through securing the fake date excuse to try to get in your pants, the guy hears back from the original booty call and drops the conversation with no explanation?
Randomize