no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
So i realized that if i bought everything from my google search history for the past week i would have a dolphin, a wolf costume, a unicorn costume, a katana and a bullet proof vest. Not sure how the dolphin would fit in but the rest of it would end up in one awesome night or someone would die. Either way i say we do it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I like to imagine god has to get plastered to deal with the fact that he made you and me
I slapped him but he didn't wake up. He just nuzzled my head, hugged me closer, and smiled.
I didn't even respond. Just letting the crazy settle before I calmly fuck his shit up.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
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