My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
I can't believe all the places I got into shoeless last night. Apparently no one will say no to a girl covered in paint with a ripped shirt
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I.V.'s should just be available for purchase at Walmart. God I'm dehydrated.
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Slept with my first Irish dude before I even got off the plane. Dublin has no idea what I have in store for it.
What is she getting? Last time we talked her behavior was conducive to getting a tramp stamp on her face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize