using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
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I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
My dog misses eating marshmallows out of your butt when you're passed out. That bordered on sex abuse, now that I think about it. My bad.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
OMG. When you threw the used condom on your floor you threw it in my purse!!! I just went to grab my headphones and it was stuck to them!
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
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