I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I JUST REALIZED HOW SOFT YOUR TABLE IS! and I also just started rolling
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry, I know you're at the airport but a gram of coke is missing so good luck with security!
Can you come pick me up and take me to breakfast then the police station?
Where's your car?
The girl I brought home apparently stole it
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I'm pretty sure the Jahovah's witness only came to our door because the front says "Twerk Or Treat"
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
If you're not my stylist, having sex with me, or agreeing to have sex with me don't fucking touch my hair.
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