your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
i decided not to call her again when she started singing "goodbye my lover" as i was walking out the door..
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
careful of the bathroom.... theres some drunken ninja turtles in there....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure a homeless guy just told me to 'lick his balls clean' because I looked at him.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
He told me I was 100% better then porn then passed out nto the cake
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I have no idea what those words in that order meant, but if you go to Florida send me pics of strippers
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Had a job interview today. Walked into the room and said "IT'S GO TIME, BITCHES".
Randomize