why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
wanna play who's drunker? I just made macaroni & cheese taco and offered it to the pizza Guy as a tip.
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
I woke up naked and surrounded by M&Ms
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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