I just gave my whole company pinkeye. How's that for a summer intern's lasting impression? BOOYAHH
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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