In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
Sarah, plain, and tall I adore you
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
He was in the middle of making out with two girls at once, but then the guy next to me said "I feel like I'm watching Animal Planet" he stopped to give him a high five
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
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