I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Also epiphany: I gotta quit fucking with dudes that have never seen Harry Potter. They all turn out to be shitheads who probably eat honeydew.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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