My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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