Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
the snow is so cold on my vagina.
why do you have snow on your vagina?
vodka and heels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sperm doesn't mix with malibu too well
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
No. He burped at a 3 year old, roared at him and proceeded to scream at the kid's parents to watch their child. The manager of Olive Garden was on our side.
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I told two kids in their homecoming outfits to use a condom because of Ebola. I may have saved a life last night
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
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