I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
Be proud. You give fat lesbians everywhere shower-nozzle worthy material for weeks on end.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I put tequila in my salad dressing yesterday. Step the fuck up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
Leave it to me to pull up my boyfriend’s grandfather’s obituary just to find out the name of his sister.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
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