He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
And all i could do was bury the part of me that felt guilty for cradle robbing and put on my dick swallowing bib.
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
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