I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
I just saw a kid walk into class with his dad. Fuck his life.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why am I drunk on a roof painting at 11 in the morning
Tell her you can forgive her unacceptable behavior because her dad and his dog weren't married when they conceived her.
you came here, splled a bunch of margaritas, hung up a picture of yourself and then left
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
I'm gonna give him birthday punches. On the dick. With my mouth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like how I just yelled in the window at Mcdonalds drive thru, got his number and then fucked. it was like I ordered a happy meal that only can be had after midnight.
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
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