yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Um he just came into the kitchen naked to get her purse or something?
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I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
This is why I can't have Wednesdays.... Or adult decisions.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I just remember looking over and seeing you on top of him and us high fiving. That's when I knew we'd be perfect roommates
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
My breasts were aching with rage.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
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