HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I don't want to have to wonder if I'm draining my pasta in the same side of the sink you pissed in
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
It's like a booty call, except its for tacos...and you're my brother.
It's blow job season.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Send me another check for the tickets. I scratched out "anal wax" and now the bank won't take it.
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
ill give you some hints: blood, carnival, fog machine, happy meal.
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize