I'm drunk in f*****g wisconsin and want to kill myself.
If it's any consolation, be grateful that you're not in New Jersey.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I can't believe I'm wasting this thong on a guy in a sweater vest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
It was worse than that time I did shots of BBQ sauce and pierced my own ear with a thumbtack
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
There is a man playing a trumpet at this brunch and I hate life. Too hungover for this. Send help ASAP.
Stop acting like the Lucky Charms you're feeding people is actually ecstasy.
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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