Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
So I have a scar from when the stripper tore off my underwear .... Best birthday ever
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Pretty sure this radio station is run by a cult. Good thing it's in Spanish, can't brainwash someone who can't understand you.
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