This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
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I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
Just a smidgen more estrogen and shed be golden
She's got a legit dose of dude going on
No kidding. All she needs is a cheek full of chewing tobacco and I'd have fucked John wayne.
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
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everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Just had a customer call his drug dealer in front of me but act like it was normal call.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
So now I'm just going to brush my teeth, get high, and go to sleep. Like an adult
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
how does that bad decision feel?
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