What you up to?
Having coffee. Getting eyefucked. Eyefucking.
Full throttle
Some guys are relationship guys. Not our niche.
I woke up and my panties were thumbtacked to his wall. Out of my reach.
I dont ever wanna see you tell my little brother to "spread the seed" ever again
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
It's like even though I'm not in college anymore my body still knows it's September and is putting itself into competitive binge drinking mode.
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
How many more of your relationships do I have to destroy before you realize sleeping with me isn't a good idea?
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
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