mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that when I see babies I feel bad for them because its going to be forever until they are 21?
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
I had so much drainage I couldn't moan properly. Fuck allergy season
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Btw I don't have words to express my appreciation at how many times you've had to be on a dirty bar bathroom floor for me in the past two weeks
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
Never drinking again. Maybe, if our boss gave us more 3-day weekends we would know how to handle ourselves. That was a shit show.
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