So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
i just funneled a beer through a mask n snorkel.. can you check that off my bucket list..
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
He asked me what I wanted the cake to say and I then asked him if "I'm sorry for throwing up in your bed last night" was too long. He said it was...
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
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