Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
I'm really glad I had vomit on my sweater when I met his sister.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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