I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
He just helps fat girls get exercise. One walk of shame at a time.
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
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