My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
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i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
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I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
I was throwing up in the shower. He was throwing up on me. It was a cute couple moment for us.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
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