put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize