just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ok in all seriousness. Alcohol intake is now restricted for me. I found handcuffs in my trunk.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
U know when u get really drunk and u don't think anyone can see what your doing? If I'm that drunk the possibilities are endless
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
Fucking holidays. How do I have this many men who want to fuck me and none of them are available when I'm ready to blow my top?
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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