Texts From Last Night

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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works

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  (601): I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works http://tfl.nu/8yse
  Replies (12) Good night (1070) Bad night (434) Order T-Shirt
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  (504): View more from Louisiana

  so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads

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  (504): so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads http://tfl.nu/yn7g
  Replies (24) Good night (496) Bad night (6965) Order T-Shirt
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  (678): View more from Georgia

  Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again.

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  (678): Last night, you attempted to motor boat my vagina then proceeded to blow raspberries on it. Don't ever do that again. http://tfl.nu/y1d0
  Replies (32) Good night (1140) Bad night (6056) Order T-Shirt
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  (718): View more from New York

  Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.

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  (718): Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen. http://tfl.nu/l1y2
  Replies (34) Good night (4503) Bad night (530) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.

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  (631): I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future. http://tfl.nu/mg9l
  Replies (27) Good night (4444) Bad night (568) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.

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  (443): repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. http://tfl.nu/ux00
  Replies (16) Good night (5570) Bad night (1239) Order T-Shirt
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  (952): View more from Minnesota

  On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it

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  (952): On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it http://tfl.nu/wltj
  Replies (6) Good night (2639) Bad night (788) Order T-Shirt
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later

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  (717): check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later http://tfl.nu/adck
  Replies (8) Good night (2420) Bad night (703) Order T-Shirt
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers

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  (314): Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers http://tfl.nu/hxbz
  Replies (4) Good night (2336) Bad night (620) Order T-Shirt
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  (434): View more from Virginia

  This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.

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  (434): This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened. http://tfl.nu/f3s1
  Replies (4) Good night (2165) Bad night (1068) Order T-Shirt
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  (423): View more from Tennessee

  I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees

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  (423): I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees http://tfl.nu/90bg
  Replies (8) Good night (2443) Bad night (766) Order T-Shirt
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  (443): View more from Maryland

  So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..

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  (443): So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses.. http://tfl.nu/gsxe
  Replies (14) Good night (1663) Bad night (439)
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  (210): View more from Texas

  I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers.

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  (210): I'm at the hospital waiting for my sister to push out her kid. I think I'll roam the halls and shame all the teenage mothers. http://tfl.nu/eiw9
  Replies (8) Good night (1610) Bad night (542) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?

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  (207): Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park? http://tfl.nu/iybx
  Replies (9) Good night (1171) Bad night (672) Order T-Shirt
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  (706): View more from Georgia

  Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?

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  (706): Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night? http://tfl.nu/bcib
  Replies (2) Good night (145) Bad night (533) Order T-Shirt

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