I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
The beers last night were like the tears from god
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
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